Adventures in Parenthood: Episode 1

I made my first call to the Poison Control Center today. I was washing dishes while Eli stood nearby pushing the dishwasher rack in and out, as he often does. Following an intense pot scrubbing moment, I looked up just in time to see Eli eat a finger full of liquid Cascade with bleach, that apparently hadn't rinsed away in the previous wash. Super. I frantically tried to wipe it out of his mouth, but could tell by the look of disgust on his face that I lost that battle. The nice lady on the other end of the phone told me to wash his hands and face, and around his mouth to avoid any skin burns. Then give him a couple spoon fulls of yogurt, a glass of milk, and watch for any coughing or vomiting. So far, nothing out of the ordinary. She also took my name and number and said she'd call in an hour. I've not heard from the nice lady. Maybe she just wanted to report me to the State. Again, super.